|May 21, 2011|
According to televangelist Harold Camping and his multitude of billboards, the end of the world is coming tomorrow, May 21st, 2001. He has previously given an incorrect date for “The Rapture”, but this time he is REALLY SURE about it, and he’s spent a lot of money on advertising, so we’d better take him seriously.
Maybe Harold made some kind of deal with Jesus for a special appearance? A reunion tour with the zombie apostles perhaps? Jesus hasn’t put anything out in millenia, so his funds must be running low. Who knows, maybe he’ll even open up a can of Divine Judgement on our asses just for fun!
So, since we’re so sure that Jesus will be here tomorrow, what are you doing in the last day before Judgement Day?
Are you making sure the house is clean for him? Looking for a hotel in case he tries to crash on your couch? Are you giving everything away to your heathen friends who won’t be Raptured? Are you the heathen friends, and if so are you fervently begging for forgiveness just in case?
Most of you are probably just like me, not worrying in the least. Perhaps I’ll spend the time writing about Christianity’s long and fruitless history of such predictions for you to read when the world doesn’t end tomorrow.
…but hey, if you want and excuse to party like it’s Judgement Day Eve……