Propaganda 101: 101 of the World’s Funniest One Liners (Living Waters Tract)

This tract is a giant fold-out with a yellow cover, four internal pages, and four external pages (including cover.) Inside pages have white backgrounds and the external pages have yellow backgrounds. As the title suggests, it has one hundred and one one-liners of varying humor, with some Christian snipes at atheism and science mixed in:

48. National Atheist’s Day: April 1st.”

69. The Big Bang Theory: God spoke and BANG! it happened.

70. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

97. Evolution: True science fiction.

And so on.

Although, this one-liner is just weird:

43. God made mankind. Sin made him evil.

The tract part is a tiny little part called an editorial on the third internal page.

This tract manages to provide its message with only one singular Bible cross-reference and one paraphrased line.

“Probably the most thought-provoking one-liner is ‘Eat right. Stay fit. Die anyway.’ It’s sad but true—no matter what you do, you will die.

Basic appeal to fear.

One of the next lines is particularly weird. “Jesus said, ‘Whoever looks up on a woman to lust after her, has committed adultery already with her in his heart.’” I look at other females quite often to lust after them, to this date I have not suddenly become male. I am not an amphibian or fish, I am a mammal. Unlike amphibians and fish, mammals have never demonstrated spontaneous gender changes. (Perhaps this tract is only meant for the boys and I just don’t know that it this line means it doesn’t apply to me.)

You know that you will be guilty, and end up in Hell.” The threat of Hell canard once again. I am going to take a poll here, my readers, who wants me to come up with a series of categories for grading and I’ll tick them off when I dissect one of these tracts. Certain themes do crop up again and again, I hypothesize that their frequency will match the relative strength of any given dogmatic meme in the religion. Threatening people with Hell is one of the most frequent and across-the-board. Demonstrating Hell exists isn’t.

In fact, I don’t know that I’ve read a single religious tract that manages to demonstrate Hell in any meaningful fashion. Insofar the threat only appeals to Christian mythology. This is another example of the Big Lie propaganda mechanism combined with the appeal to mythology. Not only is this threat repeated over and over, it relies on the reader of the tract to never attempt to discover or unveil the lack of evidence for any Hell.

Please do that today…you may not have tomorrow.” This is a favorite line spoken by life insurance salesmen in movies. I don’t know about how they sell life insurance in the real world, but making creepy assertions about the possibility that you might not survive the night is another appeal to fear.

At least a few of the one-liners were actually funny.

11 thoughts on “Propaganda 101: 101 of the World’s Funniest One Liners (Living Waters Tract)

  1. btw thinkin it about it all that God talk in that tract above wont make sense to you in fact nothing i say about Jesus etc. will make sense to you

    but this is a simple description of hell from a gospel tract:

    Hell is eternity in the presence of God without a mediator. Heaven is eternity in the presence of God with a mediator, the Lord Jesus Christ.

  2. Hi clinton! Thanks for the reply, and yeah this one really didn’t hold my attention; but it was the next down in the pile that I’ve received from people. (It’s a physical pile on my desk, wrapped in a rubber band.) I assure everyone that there are much more serious looking tracts in the pile.

  3. clinton, nothing about Jesus makes sense, period.

    Funny, I’ve always wondered why the Christians have two April Fools’ Days. One they call Easter….

  4. Brent ~

    You seem to be saying that the Resurrection is a hoax or a fraud.
    Would you care to debate that point?


  5. In all the ‘debates’ I’ve seen you in, you’ve never once gave good or adequate evidence. Bring any evidence you have to bare. If I have time I will gladly refute it.

  6. *sigh*

    I don’t understand why you feel the need to be so dang uncharitable, old friend.
    Look, if you make a good point during a debate, you make a good point.

    What I’m saying is that your response displays such a stiff close-mindedness that it’s difficult to imagine that you could ever concede that just once someone on the other side of you may make a good point – you know, something that you may not know the answer to or that you may actually be wrong about. I respect atheism as really the only half-way sensible alternative to Christianity. I truly think that if Jesus was not Lord, then the only semi-reasonable alternatives would be Judaism or yes, some form of atheism.

    However, I do not think the evidence points in that direction at all, so even though I may empathize with you in a certain way, at the end I think you are incorrect. But this does not mean I can not see where you are coming from most of the time.

    Anyway, if you are serious, then how about a sort of web cam video ‘debate’ instead of typing? It’d be quicker. I can e-mail some ideas I have on this if you are interested.


  7. How does my post display closed mindedness at all? I’m was being quite honest and frank, in every debate or argument I’ve seen you in you make a lot of very bad points, and rarely have any actual evidence behind you. What your good at doing is pulling random factoids out that more often then not prove to be ether out right wrong or highly distorted, and quickly changing the topic.

    There’s nothing closed minded at all about what I’m saying, you have simply and repeatedly given arguments which don’t hold up. You your self have NEVER accepted any facts and evidence that goes counter to what you believe. All you have to do to convince my that I’m wrong is give me real evidence of such. Again you’ve never done so. You try to point out first century historians like Josephus but then refuse to accept that close analysis of his work indicates out side alterations, and then I remember you tired to us Papias as if it was a good or first hand source. The material you have argued with has always lacked substance. Sure the first time someone listens to you (my self included) it sounds like you know what your talking about; It seems as if you’ve brought with you valid points as well as evidence, but once someone goes and actually examines your arguments the massive holes and lack of substance becomes quite apparent. I’m not being mean, or harsh, I’m simply stating the general lack to your arguments.

    You called my close minded yet I have actually listened to your arguments and tried to understand them. You can call me closed minded all you want, but I’m anything but. I will still listen to what you have to say, which I made apparent in my first post, thought I have no illusions any longer that you will actually provide something of substance rather then recycled tissue paper. I’m simply being honest with you. Forgive me if you can’t handle it.

  8. Kazz -

    would you like to host a written debate between Tim and myself here?
    it’d need to be on the main blog post section for it to work …
    if so, hit me up!

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